the man who collected food (2010)

On By eric undeadIn AT LEAST THEY TRIED

I think it’s common knowledge that most people can’t pay attention to anything too long anymore or are somewhat OCD and I realize that I fall into the latter, with mine being more OCD rather than less. I also know I have my ways and my things and I like things to be in a certain order (in place, arranged, safe) and my collections pristine (and preferably not touched) – so, whatever we could self diagnose there.  Why did I want to watch this movie? Because the title itself belonged on this blog.  Do you collect things? I know I posted something recently about my ephemera – I have my things and I have my souvenirs and they are parts of my life that have lead me here. (There’s a relatively new song out by a band called Chevelle called “Remember When” – goddamn I can’t listen to it without getting emotional, maybe I’m just getting old or maybe it’s because I almost died twice last year but FUCK I love that song) (sorry). [I mean, doesn’t everyone have a box just for their boxes of matches?] {THE GOOD DOG!}

Hopefully then, sir or madam, you know what it’s like to be focused on your collection(s) and understand what’s going on with this character’s obsession – collecting food, although I would hope that human decency would keep you from taking the path that this guy takes – since he won’t eat his food – he has to resort to eating something – naturally and of course, people.  This horror comedy will not appeal to many people at all, there’s little production value, obviously not much budget and the acting is poor, to say the least. But this is pretty funny (I promise), actually very gory and was entertaining for it’s little over an hour run time. There’s also a pretty cool slo-mo scene in the middle were the lead is chasing the members of his support group around, killing them – oh yeah –> and eating them. My recommendation would probably be that you won’t like this in general, of course, unless you must collect things on your blog and report back on them in accordance with The Science of Appropriation and Cumulation of Objects Relating to Moving Pictures and the Orderly Order of Film Seers. Or, the TSACORMPOOFS for short.

The lead here is a guy named Miguel.. He collects cans and boxes of food and goes to great lengths to keep his collections pristine. He has lit display  cases and bookshelves filled with food all around his house – he also has a freezer full of of living and dead human beings, to feed his constantly growling stomach. He also has a mom who won’t get off his ass (poor acting here), a neighbor who thinks aliens are trying to get him (poor acting here), another set of neighbors – a father and son, that shoot deer all day long (the acting from this pair of folks is horrible), and his fucking starving stomach. There’s not much plot to this thing (spoilers): he eats the people in his freezer, he eats his support group, he eats his deer hunting neighbors, he goes to the hospital and eats a patient, he eats his mom, his alien-obsessed neighbor finds out what’s going on, sets his hostages free (who somehow all die grizzly deaths) but, god save the queen, Miguel manages to get away, finally finding solace in —> hot dogs.

Just look at that yummy piece of heaven. I wish it was smiling or winking at me. Mrs Film Miasma has ALWAYS given me a hard time for being willing to and actually consuming gas station hot dogs but – and you can quote me here without paying me royalties – FUCK YES. I also found it heartbreaking in that episode of The Simpsons when Apu cleaned the hot dog machine for the first time ever and Homer could barely taste the hog anus. Apart from that narrative aside, what do you think this movie is trying to say about our wieners? Our franks are made from humans or ground up hog anus is just that fucking delicious?

In glorious conclusion and sighs from the audience, The Man Who Collected Food is probably not for you or you or you or you but it has a place in my set of stuff. Sadly, I do not possess a tangible piece of it as a souvenir but I have this place where it will stayed nestled and safe and won’t get any fucking coffee cup stains on it. Or frayed edges. or germs from careless prowling, greasy fingers.

Filed under: AT LEAST THEY TRIED

21 thoughts on “the man who collected food (2010)”

    1. I bought it a few years ago so it’s languishing in my iTunes library with The Swimmer and Seconds. Looks like it’s out there on tubi going by Cannibal Collector if you feel like filling your stomach with hot dogs and cheap beer and giving it a look. I really don’t know if you’ll like it, even for the science of it.

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      9. Oh, it is! Seconds is great! I was just lamenting that I have some movies stuck on an old iPad that I can’t watch anywhere else. But, in the undeniable case of my laziness, I haven’t tried very hard.

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  2. This sounds as strange as Butt Boy! 😃 But much worse. (I have to admit that Butt Boy was actually quite well made for a movie about people disappearing up a guy’s butt). How did you almost die twice?! 😳 And is all that Chapstick yours?!? And do you know hot dogs come in jars & cans over here and I still think that’s really weird?!?!

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    1. I’m actually looking forward to Butt Boy! That sounds right up my alley! And I don’t mean my butt! Yep! That’s my lip treatment – a man can never be too unprepared when it comes to dry lips!

      I did – I guess I thought you might have known somehow. Yeah – I got really, really sick back in Jan of 2019 (before covid and shit) and I had strep in my FUCKING EYES and then it got in my throat and then I had kidney failure and sepsis. I was in a coma twice and – well – i don’t know if you’re always expected to come out of a coma.

      Never get strep!!

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      1. I ran out of Chapstick months ago but I’m one of these people still happily living in quarantine so am not going out to get any. It sucks, but…. Man I love not leaving the house! Not gonna lie! 😉

        Holy shit! Yeah, you mentioned strep but I don’t remember comas & stuff! And then stupid Covid came along after THAT. Hope you’ve managed to avoid that!

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      2. HOW DO YOU SURVIVE????????? I could not make it without #TheBalm

        Yep. Sepsis is some bad fucking shit. I had to see a neurologist and he said it’s now the third leading killer behind cancer and heart disease. So – WASH YOUR HANDS!

        #WashYourAss

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      3. I do have some other lip balm stuff. But nothing is as good as old fashioned Chapstick! 👄 (That emoji is all they have for lips? Look like porn lips!).

        Well, thank god you got better!!! Man, that does sound nasty! ☹️

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      4. OMG do I need to send you folks some Chapstick???? WTF England???

        Because I care – I found a box of twelve original sticks I can ship your way. Wait. with British taxes that would probably cost me a million dollars. Let’s rethink!

        #BulkTubes
        #BulkLubes

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